Friday, March 6, 2009

An Interview With----Ourselves

Since we can't say anything nice after a pair of lousy road losses---so we decided to give ourselves an in-depth interview about the Hawks and their recent performances, conflict in the locker room, and what the final result is for ATL's Finest:


HHB: What are your opinions of these last two losses by the Hawks?

Well, We'll have to watch the films, see the coaches tape, and make our opinions or cop-outs from there. We guess you have to say we lost, but we'll see when we watch the tapes.

HHB: Why do you think the team's defense has been poor the last two games?

It has? Wow--Not sure what you all are expecting. We held the Bobcats to under 55 percent shooting tonight---that's saying something. You know defense isn't all about stats. It's about effort--and staying away from playing defensive together all of the time---save it for the end, don't peak too soon---that's our philosophy.

HHB: What's the situation with Josh Smith?

Well, you would think the team would have put all of this to bed before they brought the coach back or given Josh a huge contract---but really, where is the drama and entertainment in all of that? This team isn't championship caliber yet, they put some wins on the board, now in the days between establishing ourselves and the playoffs, we need some excitement---ergo, benching Josh Smith for quarters at a time. As Bernie Mullen said: It's not about winning, it's about entertainment--we want entertainment.


HHB: Is there something wrong with Josh and the coach?

There is nothing wrong--what do you mean? Just because Smith has shown uneven interest in doing the fundamentals, what does that prove? Oh, we're sure you are going to point out such "statistics" as his declining shot blocking, rebounding, and free throw percentage---phhhbt---We can make stats show anything----have you been tracking his glaring on a nightly basis? We didn't think so, and he has career highs in that and inappropriate laughter.

HHB: Yes, what about the decline in rebounds and blocks?

Simple. It's Al Horford's fault---that goody-goody is hustling all over the place and stealing all of Josh Smith's rebounds and blocks---really, when that guy is working that hard, why should Smoove?

HHB: Going to take back all that 50 win talk?

We could take it back---and then put it back in---do a Hokey Pokey with it, but what difference does it make? They aren't playing as a team to go further in the playoffs anyway---and it all sets up for a brilliant master plan.

HHB: Master Plan?

Ohhhhhh Yes, we're hoping that the Hawks can get into another inspirational seven game series where the team doesn't advance but can be inspired by their announcement to the league that they definitely belong in the first round of a playoff tournament that involves half the league. Saying to everyone---Hey, we're average, too! That's what got us off to a good start this year, so maybe a heated non-upset of some team could lift our spirits and bring us back together again---that's gold.

HHB: Sounds a little negative---

Is that a question? Because we're not being negative, but just tell us---who looks like the team that's six games over .500 the last two nights, the Hawks or the Knicks/Bobcats.

HHB: Can we answer none of the above?

Exactly.

HHB: What do you all think the Hawks can do to get out of this rut?

Play a lot of games at home (Check)

Begin to use Al Horford more in the offense (Check)

Take away Josh Smith's video game privileges so he can learn the rules and what's expected of him.

Do the same with Mike Woodson.

Don't forget to play Zaza Pachulia to help with rebounding. (Reminder: Big = Big)

Play a lot of games at home (did we say that already--it's that important to our success).

HHB: Final thoughts?

There is a lot of blah going on with this team right now---we'll see them fight through it if they can keep their heads on straight in the meantime---home is the best medicine for growing teams.

The HHB often talks amongst themselves for comfort and to ask for directions when on the road---All advise and maps can be given in the Comments Area.

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